Saying goodbye

...is hard to do. I still haven't been able to do it. It's been nearly 16 months. You might note there haven't been a lot of posts in the last year or so. There haven't been any comments or posts about Juicy. We lost my sweet, sweet girl on 9/29/2013 in a most tragic, unexpected, and devastating way. She passed away in my arms and I hold a lot of guilt near and dear still as to the events that transpired. I hope to find a way to write her story here, to get it out, and to create a memorial fitting to my precious little girl. Someday. For she was very, very big in her tiny, little self. I'm torn to say heart dog. I feel like I've had three because to say she was it is disloyal to Vegas and to Leo. But she occupied a huge part of my heart and I don't know how to face today, tomorrow, and the rest of forever without her. I hope she is running free and wild and sassy as ever over the rainbow bridge. I hope she is pain free, joyful, and blissfully unaware of the devastation in my heart. Because that little girl, she brought nothing but joy and happiness. Every time I think of her, well, I try not to because I end up bawling. Oh how I wish to be in a place where I could think of her and smile. So for now, it's a long goodbye.